The Legacy of Bill Murray

Last month I was digging a watermelon patch along the side of my house when my shovel sank deep into the earth and I discovered a cavernous hole about a foot beneath the ground. I wrote it off. This is southern California the earth is shifting constantly and sink holes are frequently discovered, sometimes rather unfortunately. Then one day while digging up not one, but TWO very dead sweet broom plants, I discovered another hole. Quite perplexed I took to Facebook with my quandary. "Might be a mole" said a landscaping business owner friend from back home. "Viet Cong" offered another slightly less qualified individual. Then my mother-in-law offered this "Sounds like gophers to me, but they are very hard to get rid of.". And finally this sage wisdom from another gardening pro "stick a hose down the tunnel, I did that some years ago and he moved next door." I don't know if I'm prepared to deal with the karma that comes with hosing an animal out of his current abode, even if it is under $60 worth of lavender plants. One time, many years ago, I fed an earwig to a Venus fly trap and we see where that has gotten me.

 So this bring us to today. I have been living in blissful ignorance, thinking that this furry creature and I are living together in shared harmony, and I am planting the remainder of my tomato seedlings on an absolutely perfect day when *thunk* that damn shovel sinks into another tunnel. I stop, examine the hole for a bit determined to write it off once again and move on with my gardening life when suddenly, without warning or provocation that little bastard comes OUT OF HIS HOLE, and smiles at me*. Again, as with the earwigs, profanity ensued . Lots. Then out came the iPhone to grab this quick paparazzo-esqe photograph of the little shit before he scurried back into his hole. He then proceeded to CLOSE THE HOLE BACK UP before my very eyes, as if to say "No photographs please! No photographs!". I am at a loss.

*Slight dramatization.